The demarcation between a romantic and a stupid is so fine, that in my opinion all of my existing bachelor friends have surely thought that they belonged to both with equal ease at varying points of time. As with everything what we finally would be classified as, would entirely be a matter of perspective.
The entire process of getting married is quite cumbersome to say the least, particularly, if you have not already found a woman who can sustain your interest and wonder of all wonders be capable of holding a fairly intelligent conversation and miraculously enough also like you sufficiently well enough to say "I Do".
Its not that such women do not exist. I am sure they do, but they are an endangered species. Which begets a very significant and distinctly uncomfortable question. If they were there, then where were we ? And if we were also there amongst them, then the conclusion is not a flattering one for us !
So, how did those of our friends who were not bitten by the cupid bug managed to get married ? They, mind you, did not look for so many things. Which makes me question our parameters for qualifying someone as interesting and worthy of a second look.
Are we looking for the right things ?
Since all of my friends are 'apparently' happily married does it matter whether the person is knowledgeable or intelligent or has a definite perspective in life or finally does it only boil down to getting a good person ? I have no idea what it takes to share a life. But the idea of a shared life I have is something that I cannot possibly explain.
What we can explain is our undying relentless pursuit of trying to find the one with whom there can be no boundaries in thought, who would have a way of looking at things which might not be mine, who would have an identity of her own, who would have a vision which would challenge and stretch the horizon.
And that is where our stupidity lies. That we will not give up even though the prospect of a harrowing defeat is evident. Is it then a coincidence that we we be labelled the crazy romantics who would hardly ever want to conform to reality but would want to write a sonata of our own ? For now, however, only the discordant notes are our only companion and time our only refuge.
12 comments:
is that the royal "we"? coz I can't imagine one more of ur kind ;)
keep up the hope man... after all, a romantic fool and a foolish romantic are one and the same...
Hmmnn....I can understand your dilemna
'Worthy of a second look!'...what an arrogant statement!
Well, all I can say is that...window shopping is good....but too much time spent on it would leave you with the shopping bags empty :)
And if I may add, till 35 this search is 'Romanticism'...after that, 'Stupidity'.
Amusing. Naive. Honest. Need I say more? P
Vijay:
Well, perplexing it might appear to be, but there ARE people like me. Two more of the foolish romantics - my friends are there.
Anupa:
You mean, dilemma of being slated as a romantic or stupid? Or the basic dilemma itself ?
Scribbler:
Yeah, as long as you think it in your mind its not arrogant, nor is it cruel or perverse. Only when you put it in print it becomes so!
Is there really a difference in thought and action from the point of view of the actor and not the victim?
P:
Of course. Explain the adjectives honey ! Particularly the first two.
Hmmm.. i completely understand your dilemna. But i guess it has boiled down to attitude towards life and willingness to adapt and work together on differences while valuing the differences. I guess the rest of it all doesnt matter too much
A quote from one of my favourite movies..Dream for an Insomniac..
"There are too many mediocre things in life to deal with and love shouldn't be one of them. "
You might like it..
I have always believed if you search for The Chosen One, the search will never end, coz there's nothing called a perfect match! There are people who are compatible with you and who you are compatible with. I guess the trick is to take the plunge with whom you think as the most suitable one! Also, if you try to identify and match all your "required" traits before going into the relationship, what will be left to discover once you go into it? Major part of the fun is to discover your partner as you go along. Cheers!
Just take the plunge dude. After marriage you will realise all women are lookalike ( round shaped) & bitchy.
- MCP
At 30 you are being just plain stupid ! There's nothing called the right girl or the right guy.
You make the relationship "right".
For once trust your gut feel and go by it :-)
Ajith:
The difference will be valued if there ARE differences. And for differences to exist, the other person should have a perspective first !
Snake:
I did like it. :)
Samik:
I find your hypothesis and conclusion to be two different issues altogether.
The perfect match is not perfect in the sense of us knowing each other in absolution. Its more of the presence of requisite ingredients out of which anything could be cooked - something that I might not be able to think of even. If that be the case, then your question at the end gets automatically answered ?
Anon MCP:
I have a sneaky feeling that you may be right but I would sincerely HOPE that its not :(
Roushni:
Again, echoing my answer to Samik, the 'right' is in the sense of having the ingredients, the capacity and not about having the same opinions that I have.
A person with varied interests and a capacity to think, vastly different from mine would do.
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